Boston’s Bouncing Brilliants Bamboozle New York…
Ah, the mystical squared-off court of bouncing balls and taller-than-tall athletes saw the Boston Celtics performing the ultimate magic trick on the New York Knicks—making their superteam illusions disappear! The Celtics flung their rubber spheres into the net with the pinpoint precision of laser-eyed eagles on opening night, flying to a grand win 132-109. Jayson ‘The Lamplighter’ Tatum, whose hands seemed made of molten lava rock, sparkled brighter than the top of a basketball trophy, notching up 37 super points while dishing out assists like he was Oprah with gift cards.
Leap-frog forward to February at Madison Square Swish Garden, where the Celtics rained more threes than a Hydra raindrops! With Tatum playing like he had secret springs in his sneakers, dropping an epic 40, and Payton ‘Pawnstormer’ Pritchard riding the bench train to glory with a cool 25, the Celtics spiced up the scoreboard, sending the Knicks home with a 126-122 ‘better luck next time’ handshake. Meanwhile, Julius Randle’s career-mindedness turned to sand, as his +/. took a dip worthy of Sad Titanic.
Not to be outdone, just when the Knicks thought they’d snip the Celtic’s green cape, a jet-fueled Porzingis shot them down with 34 beam-of-light points. As Tatum tossed planet-saving threes, the soaked-up MSG crowd could hardly fathom the power of the slam-dunk Celtics. Even though the Knicks had their own KAT growling with a beastly 34 points, it wasn’t enough to catch the Celtics’ tailwind, ending the regular game-winning streak for New York at zilch! But don’t sleep on New York—they might just log a surprise in their next semi-fire showdown!
